If you read my post on Monday, March 24 then you are aware that I was filled with a disappointment that was quite painful. You may recall that I thought I had been contracted to do some work and at the last second it was pulled. I was hurt. I was dismayed. I was disappointed. I also felt that my Creator had pulled a cruel joke on me and had led me to the edge of glory and as I was about to enter the door was shut. The silent voice that guides my life attempted on several occasions to speak with me, however, I flat out decided that I didn't want to hear anything that had to do with having faith regardless of what is being shown. I felt that I had been "forsaken." I WAS WRONG! I will repeat it again I WAS WRONG and I MUST APOLOGIZE TO MY CREATOR.
I received a call asking if I was still interested in making the deal. I was stunned. Of course when that occurs the ego wants to get in the way and attempt to make the other individual suffer. However, because I was awake and fully present I knew better. I knew to work out the details in an honorable manner although my ego wanted to "dust them." However, none of that is really the issue at hand; the real issue is that I owed my Creator an apology. So, in front of my Creator and to you my friends I APOLOGIZE.
I apologize to you my Creator for the following:
- For not believing that you always have my best interest in mind.
- For even considering that you would ever forsake me.
- For turning away from you like a spoiled child.
- For loving me as I cursed my situation.
From the depths of disappointment I learned what you were trying to teach me: If I trust and believe what you have told me, I should never be dismayed, as you are clearing a path for me and at the time I could not see that you had not completed your work. Please accept my apology and I ask for your forgiveness. Because of this lesson I trust you even more and again apologize for even thinking that you had turned your back on me.
I desire to keep this lesson close to my heart and attached to my ego. Thank you my Father. It is a lesson well learned.
Until the next time,